A Letter To That Nincompoop Who Preferred Something Else over Russell Peters

Dear person who missed watching Russell live,

Russell Peters was in Mumbai in all his flamboyancy. He effortlessly made hundreds of people laugh like retards, while you sat at home wishing that you were there.
This letter is written with the intent to make sure that you don’t miss out on watching him live the next time you get a chance.

So, what exactly did you miss?

To begin with, you missed the opportunity to brag.
It’s not everyday that you get to brag about crazy shit. Bragging about watching Russell Peters live isn’t like bragging about your new car or your new phone. It takes bragging to a whole new level of cool, without making you sound gay.

Some other reasons:

Laugh like a maniac:
You would say, why would I pay someone thousands of rupees to make me laugh?
But hey, it isn’t everyday that you get the opportunity to break into a sort of a Mexican wave as the bodies of hundreds of people break into a fit of laughter.

Watch rich people get ripped apart:
If you have been watching Russell Peters for a while, you know that the people sitting in the first few rows (who pay the highest sum of money) get ripped apart. You missed having the sadistic pleasure of watching the affluent made fun of.

Two hours of unadulterated laughter:
Watching him on YouTube made you made you laugh till your jaws hurt. Imagine watching the same man live, double the power to him, and guess what, he totally lives up to all those YouTube videos that you’ve seen and much more.

A bunch of people who paid to laugh:
You would spend two hours of your life with a bunch of people who really would pay to laugh. There are plenty of people who go for music concerts, plays, movies etc. But the people who go for stand-up acts are of a different league altogether. They’re the kinds who would not miss an opportunity to laugh at something, anything… at any point in their life. Imagine the level of coolness in these people. So yeah, you missed the opportunity to be amongst these people as well.

Lastly, you should’ve been there because everybody deserves a good laugh and two hours of mad comedy is nothing short of therapy.

The ones who attended are surely going to be happy at least for the next couple of days.

And in the words of Russell, "Our cheapness changed the world…(An Indian) came along and drew a circle. "What’s that?" "Nothing" "What’s inside of it?" "Nothing" "What’s its value?" "Nothing… *Sniff* It’s beautiful (shedding a tear). We shall call it (jeero) zero. Take it and go."
So, loosen up and spare a penny from your wallet, the next time Mr. Peters comes to town.

FYI,
The Russell Peters Notorious World Tour 2013 – India Edition is sold out.

Yours sincerely,
Russell Peters’ fans, who attended the show. 😀

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7 Comments

  1. Anonymous

    October 28, 2013 at 9:29 pm

    For the non-nincompoops who paid through their noses to have an opportunity to laugh, brag, hate on rich people, I don’t think Russell Peters is that funny anymore, I don’t need to pay somebody to make me laugh, I don’t hate rich people, so this doesn’t work for me at all.
    Ps: I didn’t attend the show, I did watch it on dvd.

    • raghav

      October 29, 2013 at 7:44 am

      ^ Haha such a cry baby

    • Abhi

      October 29, 2013 at 8:18 am

      So,apart from all the other reasons mentioned, we should have watched the show so that we could brag. Wow! If bragging is the idea, we can watch it on Youtube and still brag about it, no? Wasting money so that you can brag about watching a Russell Peters show sounds like an idea which can only impress nincompoops. 🙂

  2. PR

    October 29, 2013 at 5:37 am

    I think Russell Peters is stale now… He was funny several years ago

    • anon

      October 31, 2013 at 3:40 am

      your face is stale

  3. Barcelona

    October 29, 2013 at 1:03 pm

    in about 90 odd mins russel peter show he would at the most crack about 100 odd jokes…………..that makes in 35 bucks for each joke………..now why woudl i pay anyone 35 bucks to tell me a joke??

    i am a big fan of russel peters ….and caught his show live in 2005/6 in mumbai for a ticket price of 750 bucks(which was fair enough price) taking in account the inflation i would not pay anything more than 1500 rs to watch him live……hence a minimum ticket of 3500 is waste of money….rather ctach his jokes on cd or youtube or on the net……fyi…..it makes me laugh in the same way be it live or be in online

  4. UB

    October 31, 2013 at 9:15 am

    I didn’t know getting a 6k ticket meant I am rich. I guess I can now brag that I am rich.

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