Movies are a fictional entity. Even if you come across a hardcore biographical tale of a man who overcame AIDS and built a giant sentinel robot that cured others of the disease, you can be rest assured that most of it is fake. Okay, that scenario sounds fake enough. But here’s the deal, movies have been lying to us about a lot of things. They have been assuming that the audience is naive and will ignore certain details. And we have played right into their traps. I’m sure there must have been times when you were enraged about a misguiding fact and screamed at the 70 mm white sheet of lies, “That’s not how things work in real life.” You think they didn’t know that already? It’s just that they don’t care. Why do they still do it? Because it makes for great entertainment, that’s why. Here are 5 things that movies usually contort to suit their needs, ignoring the fact that the reality is starkly different:
1. Gun shots
Many big-budgeted action films usually hire a stunt coordinator/expert to choreograph/advice on the usage of guns. If you ask me, they should fire that guy right away. Because he is clearly lying about his experience with guns. For example, every time you fire a regular 0.5 mm caliber gun, the jolt from the propulsion is strong enough to leave your arm in a cast for a good couple of months. That is if you don’t grip the gun firmly with both your hands. Silencers don’t work the way they show in movies either. The weird “puchuk” sound created by a gun with a silencer on is totally off target (see?). If a gun was really fired anywhere near your ears, it would render you deaf with its sheer intensity. And for all the stylish and slick gun maneuvers the characters pull off, the security aspect is completely disregarded. Tossing the magazine in the air and letting it gently slide into the allocated slot is not how it works. So the next time, a gun fight inspires you to pick a gun and go target practicing, remember to keep the ambulance on speed dial.
2. Gay people
Barring a few decent flicks like Milk, A Single Man and My Brother Nikhil, almost every other movie confuses a gay man with a transvestite. And a lesbian woman is basically a biker chick who is vegan and is also into goth for some reason. Someone really needs to shake the scriptwriters and director till they are jolted back to reality. Because in the real world, that is not how gay men/women dress up or behave. Well, not all of them. And even then, the behavior and characterization is so off mark, that is helps propagate the stereotype that there is a woman hiding inside every gay man’s body, and a man in a lesbian woman’s body. This is also surprising because the film fraternity has some very famous out-of-the-closet men and women who are just like any of us. The way filmmakers look at it is. “How else will the audience know he’s gay?” How about he kisses another man. Both of whom happen to be absolutely normal.
Here is another classic example of the “creative” folk using their own imagination and stretching it thin beyond recognition. While we have enjoyed several terrific alien-based movies over the years, one can’t help but notice a similar pattern. The human brain, with all its intellect, is quick to assume that man is the most perfect-looking creature in the entire universe. As a result, the aliens are portrayed as grotesque and deadly and/or grotesque and cute. And yet, the most iconic representation of an alien is akin to a kid suffering from malnutrition. Feeling too bad about your ugly appearance, weird alien creature? Here’s a superpower to keep you happy.
No one knows what aliens look like. Or whether aliens do exist. Also, “aliens” is the wrong term. Because for them, we are the alien creatures. Well, here’s hoping we come across another planet with conscious beings to help bust this myth.
When Bram Stroker wrote Dracula in 1897, little did he imagine that his vampire would one day allegedly play ancestor to Edward Cullen. Yes, we cannot get over Twilight. And we cannot forgive it either. Vampire Diaries and the Blade Series are also to blame. Count Dracula is a monster from Gothic folklore who has always roamed the back alleys of Victorian literature. But when he came to life in films, he was immediately given the persona of an aristocrat, with a suave east European accent to go with his ponytail. A few more years down the line, vampires developed an entirely new set of superpowers like super speed, telepathy and sparkling skin (what’s the big deal with that anyway?). The original source material went straight down the drain and Hollywood producers laughed as they drove off into the sunset in their expensive cars.
5. The Rastafari culture
Movies owe a lot of gratitude to the stoner culture. That is where most of the creativity flows from. It is easy to look at this fact as a way of life. But often times, movies go on to confuse Rastafari with being high. For them, it is all about growing dreadlocks and consuming Marijuana. Basically, the very personification of Bob Marley. Well, there is more to this culture that movies easily ignore. For starters, it is a deeply rooted philosophy that thrives on consuming organic food items and treating one’s body as a temple. But what do the movies give us? Mangled bodies of people blowing white smoke in the air, twisting and writhing in misery, whilst sporting the black, red, yellow and green of the Rastafari flag. While the underlying message happens to be, “don’t do drugs”, they need to be reminded that it’s not about Cannabis in the first place. Stop being mean to people of Jamaica movies! They have been through enough, for crying out loud.
So there you go, these are the ways movies deceive us about some really simple worldly facts. What grinds your gears? Feel free to share your ideas with us.