Is your life nothing short of a nightmare?
Does your doll randomly appear out of nowhere and stab you in the back?
Does it stare at you from a distance as you go to sleep?
If yes, then there is a strong chance your doll has crossed over to the evil side.
Possessed dolls can be a real hassle sometimes. They are adorable and cute at first. But remember, it just takes one evil spirit to turn them into wretched, blood-thirsty creatures. And when they do, your doll is no longer yours. It WILL hunt you down.
We present to you, ways to tackle your possessed doll. These methods are handy, as they have been tried and tested in several films. So you can be rest assured they will work (sort of).
1. KILL IT WITH FIRE!
When killing an evil doll, your first resort shouldn’t be hiding behind the couch. Because even a doll knows that’s the most clichéd place to hide. Instead, go to the fireplace, set it alight, and toss the little cretin in there. Wait till it is charred to perfection. Your dead doll is now ready to be disposed of.
Note: Don’t shy away from saying a final goodbye (Arnold style). Quote Andy from Child’s Play, "This is the end… Friend!"
2. Shoot ’em up
As you might have seen, fire doesn’t always work. Your doll may still rise out of the ashes like an ugly phoenix and try to kill you once again. Reach for that pistol, and go for broke. Empty the whole clip and then chop its head off and then shoot it some more, but this time in the heart.
3. Stab with a steely knife (It just might kill the beast.) (5 points if you can guess that lyric)
If you can’t afford a fireplace, let alone a gun, then a sharp kitchen knife should do the trick. If you are a novice, remember the pointy end goes INTO the other guy.
Use the Force.
And please, for the love of all that is holy, don’t do this…
4. Always have an Axe to grind (their filthy little bones)
For creatures their size, possessed dolls do pack a lot of limb energy. Chopping their hands ensures that they don’t choke you to death. That is only momentary though, and once the hands and legs are gone, off goes the head. Build your own private doll-sized guillotine if you will.
Lotsa Lotsa Holy Water
If normal tools don’t help, then using Holy Water should do the trick. Them evil spirits hate holy water like the Splitsvilla contestants hate each other. Be generous while sprinkling the water. Just make sure you have some stored in reserve. You never know when the spirit will strike back. Next time, it may even possess your toaster. Evil spirits aren’t the brightest lot.
Be it Annabelle, Chucky or our very own Tatya Vinchu, evil dolls are not the kind of toys you want to gift your kid. If you love your kid, that is.
In case the doll goes bananas and tries to kill you and your family, use any of the above to get rid of them. Also, we can’t guarantee that they totally work. As such, may God be with you. No seriously, only he can help you.