Kevin Pietersen to play for INDIA
In a stunning twist to the KP-Strauss saga, in a reverse of what the cricket world is normally used to (England poaching players from other countries), BCCI approached KP and offered a fast-track citizenship (applicable in 3 months), so that he is eligible to play for the Indian cricket team. Sources say the incoming Indian coach, whose identity nobody knows yet, wants KP to play at 3 in the test batting line-up so that India start winning more tests overseas—especially in England. Fresh from a triple century in county cricket, KP has accepted the offer to play international cricket again. BCCI is rumored to offer England the services of discarded cricketer Gautam Gambhir in return. Gambhir could take over as Captain of England as soon as July if he accepts, replacing Cook and Morgan in both formats.
Rohit Sharma proves his critics WRONG
MI captain Rohit Sharma has proven his detractors wrong. Many have criticized him because he explodes in the T20 league and seems like a different batsman altogether, while he falters as soon as he dons international colors. This time, however, Rohit has failed to make any impact as a batsman for MI after a good start to the league, thereby proving that he does not favourAmbani’s team over the national team, making sure that his performances remains consistently underwhelming for both. He has matured as a batsman, and his impartial temperament is there for everyone to see.
AB de Villiers sued by BATMAN
South African genius AB de Villiers, who bats at 3 for RCB, has been sued by dark superhero Batman for infringing upon his identity and arousing suspicions that there are traces of alien DNA in his system. Further on, Batman goes on to mention that his novelty is that of a human superhero with rich gadgets, and AB has destroyed the reputation by wielding a bat and showing glimpses of real superhuman ability—the kind that don’t belong on this planet. Batman claims that they were in the same class as schoolkids, but it was AB who decided to take the lesser path and play a sport that Batman never understood. When asked why he called himself Batman and stole AB’s identity, the ‘prince of darkness’ is rumored to have begun laughing hysterically and asked for his lawyer.
Illegal Party raided by BCCI
In a petty move by the ruling cricketing body, a harmless get-together comprising of all the one-season wonders of T20 cricket was raided, with some cricketers taken in for interrogation. Rahul Sharma, Paul Valthaty, Swapnil Asnodkar, Pradeep Sangwan, Sreenath Aravind, Manpreet Gony and Richard Levi were allegedly chatting over tea and biscuits before they were interrupted and taken into a discarded cheerleading bus by a police squad. When asked if they ever planned to make comebacks, many of them nodded in the affirmative—thereby sending the likes of SaurabhTiwary, Yusuf Pathan, Manish Pandey, Saha and Dinesh Karthik in a tizzy.