Big Moose could walk into the RCB dressing room in the current edition of the T20 League (and previous editions too) and feel like the most intelligent man there. Somehow, over the years, Mallya and co. have managed to showcase how utterly clueless owners and laymen are when it comes to cricket and money and deep purses. Right from the inception of this tournament, RCB is one team that has consistently annoyed, frustrated, perplexed and come up with teams or performances that defy human logic.
Here are 8 reasons why RCB should quit thinking and start playing:
Against CSK, the best team in the League, RCB dropped—wait for it—Chris Gayle. Because of his one bad game against MI. So obviously, they lost again. A brainwave of this sort was last experienced by the Sri Lankan management when they rung in 3 changes for the 2011 World Cup final, changed a winning team, weakened their bowling and lost.
How does a T20 team with Gayle, Kohli and AB manage to lose so consistently? Since there are no logical answers, the onus falls on Mr. Kohli’s terrible leadership skills. His decision to ‘keep’ AB till the end against MI after the required RR was over 12, and the decision to drop Gayle and use Starc ‘sparingly’ has been overshadowed only by his owner’s post-match beer-drenched aimless parties that celebrate the most overhyped team in cricket.
What are Rilee Rossouw and David Weise doing as foreign players in a team that has spent millions on—wait for it—Dinesh Karthik. The keeper has continued to fool franchises into bidding crores for his ‘abilities’, and you’d think they learned after DD was fooled in 2014, but no, here he is again, scoring 10 every game at no. 3, pushing AB back in the order and doing his bit for women empowerment by being less talented than his famous girlfriend (Dipika Pallikal, squash champion).
RCB have gone from a team that had test legends like Dravid, Kallis, Jaffer, Pujara, Kumble, Chanderpaul and Misbah pre-2010 to a team that has reached the final twice, choked twice and retained Kohli—who has remained loyal to his team ever since 2008—as captain despite his questionable temperament and bad form.
Chris Gayle was busy DJ-ing and presumably downing shots of unnamed alcohol while his team was being decimated by CSK, and while Kohli was playing a horribly miscalculated innings that would eventually bring Gayle back into the fold.
Siddhartha Mallya’s white pants are nowhere to be seen in stadiums, thereby not blinding oppositions into submission anymore.
AB de Villiers bats at either 4 or 5, often coming in when the asking rate crosses human limits. Being South African, he more often than not chokes under pressure after playing some memorable cameos, and almost never takes them across the line. He must feel very South African again.
Rahul Dravid, once an icon and mentor player for this team, has now transferred to RR—who are the polar opposite of RCB for the young talent they groom, whereas RCB is where young players go to die. Pujara, Saurabh Tiwary and many more have fallen prey to the most obnoxious and prehistoric team in T20 cricket.