The Worst of Bollywood: Royal Turds style

It’s the awards season in Bollywood. These award shows, no matter how obscure and predictable, yet claim to celebrate the ‘best’ of Hindi Cinema. But where there’s the best, there also has to be the worst. With a dime a dozen unwatchable list of films that Bollywood unabashedly churns and promotes with all gaiety every year, there has to be a prominent public platform that celebrates the worst with the same earnestness to pay homage to the Bollywood junkies. In the US, there are the Razzies that mock the Hollywood duds. Here in India, we’ve got the Golden Kela Awards and the Ghantas. But last year, a new brand made a grand entry in this league in its own wacky and inimitable style of tomfoolery – The Royal Turds.

Established in 2013 at Mumbai’s iconic Liberty Cinema, The Royal Turds is a full-on masala cum parody show. What sets it apart are its out-of-the-box categories. The nominations and subsequent jokes, the tongue-in-cheek humor and some hilarious dialogues often have the audience in splits. Last year the list of categories included –

Dump of the Year

Fresh Feces of the Year

Worst Turd

Worst Supporting Turd

Worst comeback

Worst Advertisement

Worst Lyrics

Worst Dialogue

Worst Casting

Director of the Year (Who/What really directed those movies)

Besides these, you can expect many more frivolous and cheeky entries to the list this time around. The event will take place on February 15 & 16 at Liberty Cinema and will feature the combined prowess of Tanmay Bhatt, Rohan Joshi, Ashish Shakya, Gursimran Khamba and Anuvab Pal. Ask them about their humor quotient and pat comes the reply, “We’re a bunch of 5 guys saying things on stage that all of us would say at bars while having a drink with our friends”.

These people are no novice though, they have written for biggies such as the Filmfare Awards, Zee Cine Awards and Stardust Awards in the past. Here’s what Tanmay Bhatt had to say about the show last year – “I’ve been working with (Gursimran) Khamba for over a year now and we believe that AIB has an identity of its own. Other shows are looking to be like an award show. They want to have juries and stuff like that, but we just want to talk about Bollywood. We are looking to play at our fan-base here because we know they like this sort of thing. I genuinely believe AIB is different from the others because I know that people come out of our shows thinking, I can’t believe they said that, but you know what, it was funny. Honestly, we just wanted to do a comedy show about Bollywood and if you ask me, most of our shows are generally crass.”

If you are a Bollywood-buff who is appalled by the regular award functions’ political correctness and questionable credibility, then this is your getaway to having a good laugh and finding some solace. Even if you’re not, still this show will manage to tickle your funny bone and perhaps boost your dislike for Bollywood’s unlikable films to unprecedented heights.

You can book your tickets right here. Limited seats available!

Here’s a clip from The Royal Turds 2013 where they presented the worst debut in Bollywood that year:

By Anubhav Shrivastava

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